Since I'm a thinking man, it's only natural that America's public obsession with bacon would get my mind working - working on developing some sort of monstrous dish suitable not only for display on glutton blogs, but for true gustatory pleasure. Needess to say, I have very little time for inedible novelties or anachronistic horrors.
I was inspired by the famous Bacon Explosion and this cute little guy, but they both seemed a bit unambitious. And I'm a lot more ambitious than my semi-yearly blog updates might indicate...
Anyway, I started with a little bit of pork:
You might notice that there's no sausage in this picture. That's because you can't buy sausage made out of...
...bacon. I'm not sure what a "pork jowl" is, but mixed with flesh in the right proportion, it made it through my grinder just fine.
I used this bacon base for a fairly typical country sausage - adding salt, pepper, thyme, and nutmeg to taste.
While waiting for Catherine to show up with some essential ingredients, I roasted the pork belly. I'd never cooked pork belly before, but I'd seen this recipe recently, and thought it would be pretty good.
It was:
Now I know how pork cracklings got their name - that skin is crunchy!
Anyway, I knew going into this thing that one variety of sausage wouldn't be enough. And since I used bacon in the first one, I bet you'll be able to guess what went into the second...
(it is that ham-shaped item in the bottom of the picture... I wish I'd actually had some ham that looked as good as the pile of fresh pork).
For contrast, I ground this sausage extra finely and added a ton of pimenton de vera, salt, pepper, and a puree of roasted pepper, hot pepper, and garlic.
Assembly time:
I started by laying a healthy layer of the country sausage on a piece of foil, and topping it with sliced pork belly...
...then, I added some bacon and smoked sausage...
...and rolled it up. After that, we covered it with (you guessed it)...
I was inspired by the famous Bacon Explosion and this cute little guy, but they both seemed a bit unambitious. And I'm a lot more ambitious than my semi-yearly blog updates might indicate...
Anyway, I started with a little bit of pork:
You might notice that there's no sausage in this picture. That's because you can't buy sausage made out of...
...bacon. I'm not sure what a "pork jowl" is, but mixed with flesh in the right proportion, it made it through my grinder just fine. 
I used this bacon base for a fairly typical country sausage - adding salt, pepper, thyme, and nutmeg to taste.While waiting for Catherine to show up with some essential ingredients, I roasted the pork belly. I'd never cooked pork belly before, but I'd seen this recipe recently, and thought it would be pretty good.
It was:
Now I know how pork cracklings got their name - that skin is crunchy!Anyway, I knew going into this thing that one variety of sausage wouldn't be enough. And since I used bacon in the first one, I bet you'll be able to guess what went into the second...
(it is that ham-shaped item in the bottom of the picture... I wish I'd actually had some ham that looked as good as the pile of fresh pork).For contrast, I ground this sausage extra finely and added a ton of pimenton de vera, salt, pepper, and a puree of roasted pepper, hot pepper, and garlic.
Assembly time:
I started by laying a healthy layer of the country sausage on a piece of foil, and topping it with sliced pork belly...
...then, I added some bacon and smoked sausage...
...and rolled it up. After that, we covered it with (you guessed it)...
...ham.
Next, I added a layer of the peppery sausage...
...and turned it over to Catherine and Casey for shaping and decoration:
(the feet have sausages in them)
Next, I added a layer of the peppery sausage...
...and turned it over to Catherine and Casey for shaping and decoration:
(the feet have sausages in them)
I didn't want the ears and tail to get all black and gross, so I took them out, and threw the pig in the smoker. I don't have a scale, but I think it weighed close to 15 pounds...
It was finished in a couple of hours.
Don't touch! That is not your meatpig, Christine...
The inside was just as realistic as the outside...
My guests were all total gluttons. I even had two vegetarians and one person with a failing gall bladder try it out (they had half slices). I was disappointed that no observant Jews or Muslims showed up, because I think they would have had to eat some too. Most of us ended up with nightmares and stomachaches. They were well-earned. At the end of the night, there was only enough left for one little sandwich the next day. I ate it for breakfast, on white bread, with barbecue sauce and ketchup.
It was finished in a couple of hours. 
Don't touch! That is not your meatpig, Christine...
The inside was just as realistic as the outside...
My guests were all total gluttons. I even had two vegetarians and one person with a failing gall bladder try it out (they had half slices). I was disappointed that no observant Jews or Muslims showed up, because I think they would have had to eat some too. Most of us ended up with nightmares and stomachaches. They were well-earned. At the end of the night, there was only enough left for one little sandwich the next day. I ate it for breakfast, on white bread, with barbecue sauce and ketchup.
